The Salty Spitoon 2: Reg's Revenge

A long line extends out of a gaudy establishment. Sounds of merriment and fighting can be heard inside, enticing one and all from afar. However, one fish stands at the barrier, filtering the wheat from the chaff. One questions determines if they're allowed to enter, or doomed... To be a weeny. That question?


"How tough are ya?"

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Welcome back to The Salty Spitoon. The premise of this RP is simple: Prove to Reg, the fish bouncer, that your character is tough enough to enter the Salty Spitoon, the toughest establishment in Bikini Bottom. If they can give the question (see above) a proper answer, then they're tough enough. If not, they're sent to Weenie Hut Junior.

Rules
1. One character at a time, but you can pick unlimited characters. Characters from any franchise are allowed.
2. Anything goes, but try not to screw other people over... Too much. Reg seems to be imbued with some sort of immortality and healing factor. Maybe killing him will prove you're tough, but maybe not.
3. If a character gets in, they're in. If they're sent to the Weenie Hut Jr., they can try again in a page or so.
4. [THIS SPACE RESERVED FOR THINGS I DIDN'T THINK OF].

Good luck. Reg is waiting.

Salty Spitoon Patrons:

Weenie Hut Junior Scrubs:

Aqua steps up to the Salty Spitoon, covered in scars from years of battling the heartless in the realm of Darkness.
She looks like someone who really needs a friggin' drink, badly.

Reg nods at the newcomer...

Uh, I never addressed how people could breathe underwater. Eh, doesn't matter.

Anyway.



"Welcome to the Salty Spitoon, how tough are ya?"

Let's just assume Aqua transformed herself into a mermaid for this. Mages in the KH Universe tend to do that. Anyway.



"How tough I am?" She slowly repeated. "I spent 11 years trapped in a nightmarish realm that corrupts the minds of whoever enters and stayed sane on nothing but my own will-power, constantly fighting against the creatures seeking to consume me all around and fighting even the manifestation of my own deepest fears and darkest desires, successfully killing myself in the process. Then, I gave up a chance to be freed of this hell for the sake of allowing a random boy to escape so he could save the world and loudly declared my creed to continue fighting until the day the worlds would be free of the thread of encroaching Darkness, once and for all!"



"Also, I am in my 30s, but I still look like this, because my skin is too afraid of what I'd do to it if it dared aging on me."

Reg leaned forward and sneered.



"Yeah, I moisturize too, lady. So what?"

Aqua really has no time for your shit. She has to get to Ven as soon as possible and needs a friggin' drink before that. 
So, unfazed, she draws her Keyblade, points it at the heart-tattoo of the guy, and causes it to turn into a broken heart that spells "M-Mo" and "mmy...!"

Also, she sets it on fire. Don't ask how that works underwater, it's Spongebob.

A teenage boy joined the queue with a NERV issue rebreather. He was going to confront his father finally, who had told him that he would be in the Salty Spitoon, likely as a ploy to waste his time trying to get into a place that would never let him in so that he didn't have to look at the pathetic boy.



"I mustn't run away....I mustn't run away...I mustn't run away...I mustn't run away!" He cried out to himself as he approached the front of the queue behind this weird blue haired chick that wasn't Rei.

Reg lets out a horrible, horrible scream as Aqua burns him and cramps his style.



"Ok, ok, you can go in! Jeez!"

*Victory fanfare to be edited in later* Aqua has entered the Salty Spitoon!

Reg douses himself and turns to the kid who's not in a robot.

"Welcome to the Salty Spitoon, how tough are ya?"

"I musn't run away....I musn't run away!"

Shinji approached Reg and took a deep breath, clencing his fists. "I'm...I'm so tough that I can face my dad and tell him that I hate him!"

Yeah...that would do it. Reg would definetly let him through showing that kind of toughness.

"Everyone hates their dad, kid."

Reg shrugs and checks out his tattoo.

"What else you got?"

Oh no. Oh no. He wasn't going to get in, he was going to fail. He was going to be a coward like always.

I mustn't run away...I mustn't run away...I mustn't run away...

"I'm so tough that I killed angels inside my dead mother whilst people surrounded me, clapping and saying 'congratulations'! A-and an adult woman told me we would do the things adults do and I choked my friend to death after I turned the whole world to tang! Please let me inside! You have to let me in there!" He clutched to Reg's chest as tears fell from his eyes.

Reg shoves the kid off using his fish arms.



"Real tough guys don't cry! Get outta here!"

The fish points to the Weenie Hut Junior's, condemning the boy to a life of being a weenie.

"Who the hell are you, buddy? Some sort of suit guy?"

"... Yeah? And so what?" Reg said, only a little shaky.

"Yeah, we do actually! No one ever asks about it and-"



"Hey, wait! You gotta prove that you're tough to get in!"

Oh, really? That must have slipped my mind.

Perhaps we should go and talk about this in that alleyway over there. I'm sure we can come to an arrangement.

Right?

"Sure, you seem like a good guy." Reg follows him into an alley.

*They return from the alleyway.*

And that's why I was voted top of my swim team!

Oh, but anyway. What did you think of that then?

Pretty grisly stuff right?

That cowboy prosecutor definitely wasn't getting up from that one again!

"Go in, just go in! I didn't need to know that..."

Reg was shaken.

*Just as he had appeared, he disappeared into the Salty Spitoon.*

From a giant, unusual wormhole in the sky, a loud, audible buzzing sound can be heard. Floating down from the heavens like a majestic, blood red and black colored God, appeared the incredibly swollen, powerful, tall, four legged centaur of a mosquito flexing its muscles while constantly maintaining an arm fold the whole time, as it stops right in front of Reg, towering him in the process as its massive, bulging arms were bigger than Reg himself could ever dream of being.